Education, does it change our thinking, really?

It has been a subject I’ve refrained myself to write in much length, but it really has gotten wayyy too far.
The articles left me fuming. Seriously.
I didn’t know since when did some got so radical, and got so low, and was more appalled when it came from a medical practitioner. Someone highly educated.

Social ills caused by disobedient wives, say Obedient Wives Club

By ISABELLE LAI

PETALING JAYA: Obey, serve and entertain your husband – that’s the key message to wives by a club which will focus on how to reduce social ills committed by husbands.

The Obedient Wives Club, to be launched today, will provide tips to wives on ways to keep their husbands contented.

Its spokesman Siti Maznah Mohd Taufik said many social ills were caused by disobedient wives who did not bring joy to their husbands.

“Domestic abuse happens because wives don’t obey their husband. He must be responsible for his wife’s well-being but she must listen to him,” she told The Star.

Siti Maznah, a 48-year-old mother of five, stressed that husbands would not visit prostitutes if wives gave them a satisfying sex life.

“Wives should welcome them with sexy clothes and alluring smiles in the privacy of their homes,” she said.

On whether it was the wife’s fault if she was abused, Siti Maznah replied: “Yes, most probably because she didn’t listen to her husband.”

Global Ikhwan, an organisation founded by former members of the banned Al-Arqam Islamic group, is behind the formation of the club. It had also launched the Ikhwan Polygamy Club two years ago.

Siti Maznah said she treated her husband’s first wife like her elder sister.

“Altogether we have 16 children in our household. But my husband is a happy man, you can see it from his actions,” she added.

She said the Ikhwan Polygamy Club had over 1,000 members comprising husbands and wives. The average number of children per polygamous household ranged from four to 26.

Women, Family and Community Development Minister Datuk Seri Shahrizat Abdul Jalil, in an immediate reaction, said she was saddened by the development, adding that it did not reflect the vast progress made by local Muslim womenfolk.

“Unfortunately even today, there are still many Muslim women who are ignorant of their rights or culturally inhibited to exercise their rights in full,” she said.

Sisters in Islam acting executive director Ratna Osman said Islam advocated marriages based on mutual cooperation and respect.

“Abusive men often use women’s behaviour as a sick justification but in the end, their actions are their responsibility,” she said

The Star

If that wasn’t already bad enough, there was another follow-up article the next day, going into further details..

Keep husbands sexually satisfied to curb infidelity, says wives club

By Clara Chooi June 04, 2011

RAWANG, June 4 — A wife who obeys and fulfils her husband’s sexual needs will deter him from infidelity or going to prostitutes — that is the Obedient Wives Club’s (OWC) solution to curb social ills across the globe.
The club launched its Malaysian chapter at the Perangsang Templer Golf Club today and plans to spread its wings to other countries like Indonesia on June 19 and even European nations like London, Paris, Rome and Frankfurt in the coming weeks.

The OWC boasts some 1,000 members already — 200 in its first chapter in Jordan launched on May 1 and 800 in Malaysia, at least 50 per cent of whom are said to be middle- to upper-class career-minded individuals and intellectuals. The club was formed by Global Ikhwan which was founded by the now banned Al Arqam Islamist group and is open to wives of all races and faiths.

OWC vice-president Dr Rohaya Mohamad told reporters that women often forget their duties as a “good wife” also entails pleasuring their husbands in the bedroom.

“If you look at the world today, women are already being treated as sex objects… in magazines, on TV… so why can’t they be sex objects to their husbands? It is legal and permitted by God.

“A good wife is a good sex worker to her husband. What is wrong with being a whore in bed to your husband?” she asked.

She said the OWC will hold seminars and talks to train women to be good wives, counselling sessions for married couples and will even offer lessons on sex and the art of seduction to those who request for them.

Dr Rohaya admitted the club’s message would invite much controversy and criticism, particularly from women’s rights groups and feminists, but insisted that a wife’s obedience to her husband would ultimately keep men from resorting to prostitution to fulfil his sexual needs.

She also agreed that the more liberated Western societies would likely find it harder to accept OWC’s objectives but reminded that the club’s concept stemmed from a universal belief in God.

She also agreed that the more liberated Western societies would likely find it harder to accept the club but reminded that the club’s concept stemmed from a universal belief in God.

A woman pleads forgiveness from her husband during a skit performed at the launch of the Obedient Wives Club at the Perangsang Templer Golf Club in Rawang today. — Picture by Clara Chooi
“It is common to have different schools of thought but at least they must be open to accept different ways of thinking,” she said.

Dr Rohaya said a man who is kept sated and satisfied in the bedroom would have no reason to stray and this ultimately results in a happy and passionate marriage.

“The family institution is protected and we can curb social ills like prostitution, domestic violence, human trafficking and abandoned babies.

“Now, this obedience is lacking and it is causing many marriages to breakdown. Men are having girlfriends and mistresses, they are going to prostitutes… I believe the problem starts at home where his sexual needs are unfulfilled,” she said.
She said women should return to the basic Islamic teaching that a good wife should fulfill four conditions — pray five times a day, fast during Ramadan month, take care of her body and obey her husband.

When asked if a wife should remain loyal and obedient to her husband if he abuses her or insists on going to prostitutes, Dr Rohaya said: “God has his ways and is fair to all. A husband is also subject to God’s rule, meaning he can go to hell too. But a woman must be a good wife to the end.”

The trained medical practitioner, who is herself a third wife and has eight children with her husband, said she is very happy with her marriage and considers her husband’s other three wives and nine children as her own family.

The club’s launch today, which was held together with a mass wedding ceremony involving 10 couples, saw the attendance of a large number of news organisations, including correspondents from major foreign wire agencies.

The Malaysian Insider

At this very moment, this is the one of the more topics being discussed in my facebook friends.
And I’m not surprised.

It was low. To compare herself, the wife, with a prostitute.
It was lower. That she sees herself as a sex object, and a sex worker.
It was lowest. That she could blame infidelities and cheating, on women. It was as good as blaming the bank for being robbed, the women for being raped, the prisoner-of-war for being tortured.

I thought a relationship, a marriage is about respect.
A respect that one has for herself/himself, as well as the respect for the partner.
A respect enough for one to stay loyal to the partner, to not stray.

I thought a relationship, a marriage is about trust.
A trust that one earned, through time, that one could trust the partner to remain faithful.

Recently, a friend of mine shared an article, which I thought was a pretty interesting read.
That a relationship that has no romance, and no foundation to sustain beyond sex is a disaster waiting to happen.
That a relationship that that did not have the foundation of trust a relationship needs is a disaster waiting to happen..and that trust needs to be earned.
I guess none of the above matters to the woman (or shall I say, Doctor) who was interviewed in the 2 article above.
None of the above matters to the other women who joins the club.

I’m disappointed, to the fact that some women have no respect for themselves. That they could, willingly, be a sex object.
I’m even more disappointed, that the person that thinks that way, is not someone whom was denied education. On the contrary, it was one that is highly educated.
Most of all, I’m sad that this could be the reason why women are fighting a losing battle, on women’s equality, on women’s rights.