Mind over matter

Just over a while back, on one fine night, a friend asked me to join a marathon..the Energizer Night Run
My initial response? “Has my friend gone crazy? Or is this the wrong window?”
For those whom know me well enough, would know that I’m not that active a person. And running is definitely not my forte.
I can’t run. It’s as simple as that. I’ve never made it to anything on that area.
My friend though, continued to convince me to join in the run with him. “It’s gonna be in the F1 Sepang Circuit! And its a night run!”
I don’t know how, or why, but I agreed, and registered for it in the end.
Perhaps it’s because my other friend will also be joining the run.
Perhaps It’s because of the F1 Circuit.
Perhaps I know that if I don’t do it now, I’ll never get myself to do it.

Unsurprisingly, when I told my other friends about me joining a marathon, most weren’t very supportive.
In fact, the most common response I got?
“Are you sure you’d be able to make it? It’s 11km ya know, not 1km! Hahahaha”
My parents, too, had a good laugh over how I would survive the run..
Many were skeptical of me finishing the run, what more within the qualifying time..
And I don’t blame them.
Because right after I signed up, I too asked myself what in the world have I done!
It seems imminent to me that I’ve just signed up to self-torture, and make a fool out of myself..for a while, it does seem like it’s the stupidest thing to do, ever..

Yet while most laughed at the idea of me joining the run, a few supported and advised me to train for it.
And so, I started morning jog with mom every weekend, my lil weak attempt to “train”
I’ve gotta admit that there were times that I thought about giving up and just forget about it.
After all, whom am I kidding?
The timing I managed to set during the training weren’t the most motivating either.
The statistics proved so.
On the second day, I managed to get 4.2km within an hour. And that was my best record.
After that, it just dwindled..
My worst? 2.6km in an hour…
Week after week, I could see no improvements on the distance, and time.
If it was anything, it only de-motivated me more.
11km in 2 hours? Realistically, it was beyond anything I could achieve, to anyone that could do simple mathematics.

I don’t know what made me continue to do it, nonetheless.
Perhaps I just wanted to prove to those who laughed at me, wrong.
Perhaps I just wanted to see how far could I go..how far would I go..
Perhaps, I just wanted to see how much could willpower pushes the body beyond what it believes it could achieve.
Perhaps, I am hoping that from here, I could get some answers to some other questions in my head.

And so, I collected my running tee, got ready, and went for the run, regardless of whether I could finish the race, regardless of whether or not I could cover it within the qualifying time.
Rationally, and understandably, I told my car-pool friends to wait for me…cuz I could take a while to finish it..if I could finish it..

The run eventually started, and I ran…and ran…and ran…
and I could not see the end in sight…
Throughout the run, I’ve asked myself if it was worth it..

Now, I believe that it really could be a case mind over matter.
Now, I believe that sometimes, you could go further than you think..that you could go further from where you think it’s the end.
Now, I believe that it was worth it.

I finished the run. My time (timed by myself personally): 1:42:53:1

p/s: The run was badly organised though. There was no official timer, no one to tell me how much further. There were only 1 water stop in the whole circuit, and the havoc for goodies bag were…just like warzone, literally.